mysterious outcome

odessa poured tons of liquid in the bowl the size of a whale and contemplated at the recipe her master, the witch she was studying under, wanted to make for the eve of hallow. it bubbled like the ragged pattern of breathing after running 5 miles of hill. what could the witch be brewing she asked herself as she half carried the bucket to the other end of the room with a make shift basin of instant refilling water fountain.

she had hoped that one day she might gut a frog or preserve lizzard brains, instead she was assigned to a really impotent woman with no fun to be with and no morbidity in mind. just the utter disgusting stuff like handling slimes, troll boogger, alot of blood and mud samples, a few trips to poo land. the usual things a witch who specializes in potions would do. but potions she didn't do much with gutting or cutting, just mixing and brewing.

still mixing this mysterious thing she didn't know what was all that occupied her and who knows what it might be.

Post of sketching

So far i've had less to discuss of my story (webcomics) in this world because of work so here's a head's up sketch update just to keep tabs of my progress, so far Act 1.1 (part1 of Act 1) has ended.

Not that much clear but the upper most left is the latest addition, start of Act 1.2 Totally took me longer than I intended it to be done.

So far Act 1.2 script is getting mossed over from the lack of attention i've been giving it the past few months since the time it was finished.

In any case right now i'm happy to say that i have made the story drag much longer than i had expected, having no story to start with and always end up starting from scratch seems to be such a non methodical and long process that right now i'm feeling the habit of mine self happen. I easily get tired of one thing... soon i'd be shifting my attention from another. Yet it has not come, and I don't intended for it to come.

So. Now. I'm focusing in making the sketches for my friends oneshot comics, which would be sold in this October Komikon

hey look TPB is in the poster... building... whatever LOLOL

Yep I'm part of the group TPB (The Plurkian Brotherhood) who had such a huge ass luck during the Indieket con in the raffle to get a spot for the upcoming October Komikon. Definitely an unexpected thing hehehehe.

Therefore i have to do better with these guys:

It's a bunch of tree's and a town... not the finished version still...

Now off to just making some stuff for my comics. Sister has just arrived... well off to complaining about my life on the other side (socialllllllllll...)

Here's the preview of the latest page for Scene8

The picture definitely made sure that it's not going to be a spoiler to anyone interested LOLOL

Thus ends thy post for now and soon will just update myself with any progress I will make in the future.

MissingDoorKnocker

burst of whatever

heeeeere we go now... oh wait i told myself not to put titles on anything that's just blindly about emotional stuff in real life? hahahaha well, this might be an exception in any case this might not be relevant to anything but just a recount of my escapades for the past few months since i've missed updating here in this blog... oh dear meeee

since the last time i remember i had passed two animation stints that i felt like i won't be doing anytime soon in the future, have finished the part 1 of my webcomics and am on to the second part wishing i still had the time or the free time to do it, have a new job that's draining my system but am glad to take it on but is now immersed in the world of people and their desires for a better lifestyle feeling a little wee left out for being unprogressive when it comes to desiring a thing in life... i bet my desires aren't entirely normal for their standards... too idealistic fufufufufu, oh had tons of new friends, launching in a world of disaster thank you... have friends on constant verge of hormonal imbalance and emotional turmoil...

(oops i just made an ass of myself again by being a smarty pants and egotistical at this moment... hahahaha... ha *scratchhead* there must be a reason why i'm allergic to existence)

Stuff... they always happen, being busy all the time with personal and slightly personal stuff... it's making me think the doom is coming sooner than expected... so constant vigilance is needed... even against a peace torn country... or era... or something...

now all i can think of is which of which is supposed to be done first... argh... *sigh*

and *sigh of relief* i thought i was going perpetually irrational, i was wrong... i just can't breathe well still...

been busy yosh yosh, but now i must make myself into an emo and obediently post about my emotions like it's the biggest deal in the entire universe ever created...

since... i have been busy with life and work currently i haven't updated anything in my online life... i don't even know if it sucks or not... i mean, before i've got all the time in the world, i could access my friends that i couldn't reach...

now all i have is this yearning...

*looksupfordrama*

it would be nice... if i'm the type of person who can positively be sociable, but i'm partly shy... it's a sad excuse...

finally getting that chance

if i said that i wouldn't try and print this comics out as an indie, i was probably bluffing that time or something. because now in almost one months time... goodness i'm going to sell it in a convention. i'm completely uncertain... i'm even making an effort of going to make a stuff toy to sell for that day. *siiiiiiiigh* i'm quite uncertain truly, but on another note i have begun to watch and download recorded musical plays~~

fancy, fancy~~

hahahaha, i couldn't quite grasp it honestly, but i wanted to watch Into the Woods again. i remember that i once had watched the play with my cousins theatre group, well that was years ago in her older sisters era of being a member of the group. i think it was the first play that made me sink deeper in fascination with fantasy. but i doubt i understood the play before hahahaha although now i completely understand the content of the songs, it's lovely, and funny~~

but musicals are good working music to work with~~~

anyway back to the comics, i've already begun preparations for the printed version. i hope i could print it cheaply? or sell it properly... i wish it would sell out... i wish the toys we sell would be bought by a lot of people... *sigh*

oh well... nothing to gain anything if we thought like this, if it doesn't... let's hope for the best of it... AND the next time would be even better~~~

that awesome moment+short story

when you realize that you've got tons of things done in the past few days and those personal vendetta claimed projects are straggling you're time to just rest when actually you aren't really that busy since in between those moments you were "doing" something you had the time to take a breather and read something else... no that's not what this article would really be about.

it's just i'm placid these days and so many things, uncertain, undecided, quite frankly i dunno if it can be non-dodged but personally i can try and find a way to solve them...

for one my plan on my webcomics Children of the Eternal Spring, well i'm planning on making a print version of it AND translated into our native language for the next comics convention or any convention if possible... although i am uncertain of any possible audience it's still worth a try... anyway the guts to push through thinking of it as an idea came to me just last week or so, but i am still unsure of what kind of arrangements i shall make of the pages and the order of the scenarios, will i keep the scenario titles... stuff like that... anyway it's a standing idea that i'm quietly putting aside for awhile as i push through finishing the first part of Act1 and the designs for part2.

and while were on the stand of ideas i'm currently man handling my own ability to think of ideas by purposefully forcing a new comics which i am excited to draft if only i could remember slash be inspired enough to continue until finishing... augh...

i think i'm frustrated, not stressed enough to be sickly thin i mean i'm as chubby as ever~

so it's just a thought lingering... but these ideas... i have to take them one step at a time... and it pains me to just... i feel quite stupidly selfish typing on and on about these stuff

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Before Alice in Wonderland

the doors to his room has never felt so intimidating in his entire life, though Chimpancey, also known as Chim to anyone who knew him, knew he needed to stand up from his bed sooner or later still his dead panned shame wanted him plastered on that very spot forever. scratching his head out of frustration and annoyance to his own sad broken hearted demise. yes, to any friend he knew will know and probably have forgotten, he is broken hearted again. the sun trickled a few drops of sunshine on his window as it slowly turned into a quiet sunset.

rubbing his thin pale elbows, free from any darkening or callousing from being used as a head stand or any use too long, thinking that spot needed a scratch because it was imaginarily itchy. his mind wandered at his embarrassing situation-slash-accident-slash- he wanted it but couldn't have the guts to properly do what ever the out come maybe but alas the out come was bitter and couldn't accept it, adding a couple of bullying and insult added salt to injury moment, he couldn't help but feel his own eyes begin to water from the sheer fact of his own... bad luck.

what had he done to deserve such a fate, was his insignificantly demeaning question to his own fate. did he torture hundreds of fly's since his childhood to deserve such a cruel joke played upon him to his emotions, mind you he had not like flies since then for being too annoying for his taste. never the less, he still did not deserve to be blatantly shamed and doubly smacked with a rejection in front of a million children from across the district. in fact that was no joke.

seeing this week was an annual inter-school competition, between at least four school who were all public schools and quite impressively been occupied heavily by thousands of students. so basically a million would have been an exaggerated blow-up but he could probably multiply all the eyes by two and will probably get that much witness.

it wasn't the most perfect plan in the world but he couldn't bear it. you see he heard she was being courted by a guy he deemed un worthy of her, he was "in love" with this girl, Cassa, she was called by most. prettiest angel he could have ever laid his eyes on, lovely hair, luscious lips, all that fancy remarks of someone blearily infatuated physique wise. simply took his breath away the first time he saw her, double it with her nice compliments and those moments she defended him from bullies. well he wasn't exactly such a very stand-offish boy.

he was a kind of albino of the school with the height of a 10 year old kid in the body of a 14 yr old, he was hoping he would still grow. sadly though this was an enough reason for him to be badly treated by "the higher" kids plus with his kind of cowardice like attitude and almost unique looks of being boyishly girlie. he couldn't be helped but dubbed as a girly wimp or a shrimpy albino. he didn't like it the least but he was glad he was at most specially if Cassa was around.

obviously sometimes he thinks he abuses his frailty just to be someone Cassa would defend, stupid as it may seem. but he had no choice, inside him he was afraid to fight back. too good to be true though when it kicked in, his chivalrous side, when he found out her suitor was that one bully who always made a good smack of his face every phys. ed. time. he hated the guy, loathed him for mocking his height and frailty, although in honesty he hated himself but thats just partially beside the point.

no man can make a move on the purest girl he's ever encountered, and thats when he stupidly decided. yes, ladies and gentlemen clap your hands at the worst suitor in this side of the world. he decided to ask her to be his girlfriend even though he hadn't even established his very ground in her life even as a friend, but of course like all sadly idiotic characters in a story, this very fact haven't established in his mind yet. rather it would have been best if it this idea had stuck in his head in the first place but no, selfish of course not wanting to emotionally hurt himself first.

too bad this act cost him at least 8 lives out of his 8 because he had asked her out but she was already contemplating on being el-bully suitors girl friend, of course the girl isn't to blame for if she found something to love to the boy our little Chim found his foul existence offensive. so finding a completely huge wall and hit it hard with a splat, also a dead end, he tried reasoning with her. she had her reasons. he tried reasoning harder. she found this completely offensive but still in the politest manner she rejected him.

saying how flattered she was to be liked by him but she only found sympathy for him. again reminding you his bad luck was really conniving to such a destructive manner, bully saw this rejection happen. way to go Cassa for rejecting a poor boy and confessing unconsciously to the man your heart belonged, give her a round of applause. depressingly no applause could be hear into Chims side of story as besides being rejected feeling bitter, he tried fighting off bully boy.

honestly not the most advisable thing in the world clearly. so yes at this point you could have guessed what happened next, everyone saw he was a sore loser. paling as white as a sheet of paper he ran home weeping at his loss, or at least trying to not bawl.

a soft knock resounded to his ears and in came his mother, who looked quite like him in a manner of speaking, which he liked and hated at the same time. her face the complete painting of concern for her favoured child.

"what's wrong?" came the practiced question of mothers. "is my son alright?" she asked again, patting him on his cold forehead.

smiling at his mothers warm hands he nodded in reply to her, even though his eyes screamed the answer 'no i'm not really, can't you even see that fact mother?'

"okay," she said, sounding a little down, to this he winced inwardly. "your brother wants to know if you've finished your assignment, he told me he'd gladly teach you today if you haven't. in fact he's planning on bringing you to the library." she told him with a little twinkle of hope to cheer him up.

he couldn't quite grasp why her mother couldn't accept the fact that him spending his time being taught by his brother would never make him happy. in fact it would probably just make him completely frustrated. not to mention in his mind he knew why his brothers bringing him to the library, it was that student teacher he was trying to impress, again. snorting at this his mother must have perceived this as a comply for she sat up clapping her hands and murmuring something he couldn't understand.

sitting up, dreading the out come of that misinterpretation. in came his older brother with a quirked brow and an unmistakable smirk before rising from his bed shaking his head.

" really? the library? i thought i'd never see the day that i'd be inside that weird place. you know you'll never get that teacher." he told him as he wore his olive green, knee length, coat.

"honestly, is that really what you think of your brother. well come on bring your things, we don't have all day." he said tapping his wrist watch.

Chim rolled his eyes as he concluded that the teacher must have an aloted time in the library and he's chasing after her before it's too late.

arriving finally, to Chim's glee and his brothers frown, they didn't make it in time. the student-teacher his brother had his eyes on, along with her fellow trainees, had already left. leaving his brother no choice.

"tsk, damn. i was hoping i could ask her out again today. that last date wasn't enough for me." he scratched his head as he watched a kid with blonde-half-sky blue hair walk by, cocking his brow at this he turned to his tiny brother. "well i guess i should leave you here. if i can beat time i can catch her before she reaches her house." he said facing the other way around to run.

before Chim could even say anything his brother had ran leaving the tiny thing standing on a wonderfully nice evening sky. he looked around him feeling a little begrudged and lost before his eyes landed on the library doors. would he dare? he thought to himself. never fond of books nor the idea of the ever lulling feeling reading. eyes beginning to adjust to the growing dimness, he sprinted in the library doors and opened it.

entering this unknown domain of written words of whatever they might be. he looked around thinking of something to do and quite frankly inwardly embarrassed at the complete and utter silence of the place. he was quite used to a hustle and bustle type of crowd, he sprinted to a corner of the library that didn't consist of anyone reading on the floor or whispered discussions on the table.

hurrying his feet to find that spot he could call his own. he tip toed to a corner on the second floor and saw a spot unoccupied, also quite dim and possibly looking pretty dusty and unwelcome corner. he looked around to see if anyone was watching and sat gingerly onto a spot.

after settling for a few minutes he looked up and found a book about a very nicely illustrated volume of Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass. wondering what the pictures looked like he pulled the heavy book from its place and scanned through it carefully. while scanning through the pages, touching it's yellow worn pages it suddenly dawned to him at how calming it felt to touch the pages of the book.

smelling the emitting old age of the book he had on his lap he couldn't stop but think about what had happened before, about his feeling of utter distress about his so called rejection in par to the end of the world. maybe, in a really deep thought, it wasn't anyones fault. looking back, he didn't really try making such an impression to her for her to like him. oh finally the idea has struck him.

everything from then on, hard as it is to swallow, was his own fault. he had deliberately dug up his own hole to die on even before he knew it. is that how impulsive he was at being loved or impressing a girl. for that he might blame the fact that at some point to prove his manliness, since he did look like a wimpy frail girl for a boy of fourteen, he need a woman he can love. not like he wasn't being loved properly by his mother, no that is a completely different thing.

something about just being impressed by a kind girl, a beauty at that, just makes him crumble and become a completely even worse wimp. rolling his eyes at this thought, he suddenly laughed out loud at this thought. eyes watering at the sides from an idea, god knows why he laughed. a loud shush came to his left, where he came from, and found himself face to face with a quite stern looking face. he knew her name was Mrs. Tad, he didn't care if he ever met her, but now he should probably. now that she looked quite stern.

"excuse me young boy, mind you. i know reading can quite make us feel alot of emotions. but do please keep it to our selves now." she said as her stern face broke into a very warm smile, he swore made his little boy heart melt with such motherly love, although it was still evident that her sternness was intact with in her voice.

couldn't help being pulled into it, he smiled back at her sheepishly and nodded. she nodded back acknowledging his earnest compliance and went back to whatever she was doing. watching her back disappear he giggled to himself then found his eyes back to the book he held. it was a good thing this library went on until the wee hours of the night or else he would have been still sulking.

suddenly realizing a quick change of lightness in his once bereaved heart, he wondered if the library was some kind of magic for making him feel, if for no better word, better. blinking, he suddenly found himself immersed, surprisingly, at the wonderfully queer world of Alice in Wonderland.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

well hope you enjoyed this entry, the character is actually another character from another short story, this one is like a prequel of some sorts to it entitled Untimely Library. eventually this one story doesn't have a trace of fantasy or msytery in it, but Untimely Library, the original story has. so enjoy~

just going to ramble a little wee bit here... i should completely reconsider the idea of blogging... it's becoming like a diary, the kind that people shouldn't be exactly reading... but i'm already used to typing in it... since i do feel the vibes that no one will read unimportant rambles from it...

on the other hand i shall announce... PAMAGAT OTL'S TUMBLR SITE *prerecorded crowd cheer plus applause* anyway it's going to be an art blog dump dedicated to the details of the OTL projects~

and as i said this entry will be a ramble so not much posting of linksies...

but i just feel completely exhausted for some reason, is it about that email i want to send to oh no manga about the anthology series, i wanted to inquire first about specifying the procedures but i have this other thought of just sending the required stuff they... listed... although i will not loose anything by sending it in... i still feel like i want to clarify something about their procedures cause at some point i feel like they have made me feel vague...

or is it the fact that i have this dampening depression that seems to come out of nowhere... although i don't feel that sad or unsatisfied... or sad... or grumpy, or... i'm doing my page work for the webcom... it's just...

i tried my hand on water colour, the actual water colour, again today... i still have it but i'm as slow as i used to be, which feels like a bad thing for me... it shows that i didn't grow that much since the last time i planted that seed... i guess maybe that's whats making me frustratedly... bored? *pinch nose bridge*

i don't really know if this kind of thing should even be shared or discussed with anyone *exasperated flinging of arms*... but in my mind it's not big of a deal to be discussed heart to heart to... to anyone in particular...